Today is a sad day for me. One of my friends from work, whom I truly respect, announced to me recently that he has lung cancer…and his outlook isn’t good. He pulled me aside and shared this news with me personally and asked that I not tell anyone because he has requested privacy as he and his family battle this deadly disease. As a result, I will call my friend Joe to protect his anonymity for the reminder of this post.
I know that cancer has directly or indirectly affected just about everyone in this world. Cancer doesn’t show any favoritism whatsoever…it strikes whom it wants, when it wants without notice…and its effects are deadly.
As I sit here and ponder the why…why did Joe get cancer when he already has Type 1 Diabetes and suffers daily simply because of that ailment? Or why does he have to be the one out of all the bad people on this earth to suffer? Honestly, he is one of the good guys. I have this idea in my head whereby I have classified people over the years as I have seen the lengths these men have gone to save their families and I simply call them my heroes. I can name them off for you right now…why? Because when I happen to be feeling sorry for myself on any particular day, I think of my heroes and what they went through and that usually brings me back to earth.
Joe is my hero.
He grew up in a very tough neighborhood in New York City and he actually had mob ties early on in his life. He talks about these circumstances very carefully…never fully sharing anything other than he feels lucky to have survived his childhood and teenage years. What he did have however were very loving parents. He described them to me as always being there when he needed them and they provided him a shelter from all of the chaos that was outside their walls…and now as an adult, he appreciates them even more.
Joe got into graphics and it turns out, he had quite a talent in this area. In fact, not only was he an artist, but he also could run a business as well. As a result, he ended up with his own agency in New York working many hours but doing very well. Then one day his youngest son was diagnosed with a very rare immune deficiency disease and Joe’s life changed. He ended up losing everything he had trying to save his son…the good news is that after years of battling the disease, insurance companies etc. his son survived thankfully due to a very difficult bone marrow transplant from his older brother.
Fast-forward 10 years.
His youngest son, for many years has had to live inside the equivalent of a bubble due to this disease but over the last few years, things have improved. He even has fallen in love with one of his nurses…go figure.
However as the situation with his boys has improved, his own health is failing and although I understand the reality of cancer as mentioned above, I am still back to the why? Why Joe? Because as I’ve gotten to know Joe over the last few years, I’ve realized that I connected with him because he is good man at his core. Deep down inside, Joe has faith. In fact, his faith is what is getting him through this challenge right now…and frankly, Joe’s demeanor is one of positivity and grace. Joe is showing me, and all of his coworkers, why he is one of my heroes…If I ever find myself dying, I pray that I can handle things like Joe…pure dignity.
Guys…I know that God does NOT make mistakes because even now I can see the way that Joe is handling his own health problems he is an example to many people. I can also see where his behavior just might be the difference in someone else’s life…In other words, how Joe handles this adversity could affect another person…that is how truly admirable he is…but is that the reason why Joe was struck with this deadly disease?
Personally, I know this truth intimately because when I went through the death of my own daughter 9 years ago…and as I listened to people explaining to me what my daughter meant to them, I felt like I didn’t know her in that way and it changed me…which meant her death had an impact on people…but is that the reason why God took her? And…Is that the reason why my friend Joe is suffering right now in order that more people might come to know Him?
Think about this…I could be the “angry guy at God” right now but after 9 years…I have come to understand that is NOT who I am…
Why does God allow things like this to happen to good people? If I had the “God” answer, I would share it with you right now…however MY opinion is very simple…
I simply trust EVEN though I don’t understand the “why” of the situation. Joe is a close friend of mine and I am very worried that he isn’t long for this earth. I pray for him everyday and “trust” that God will heal him and will spare his life. However, if God chooses not to, it is HIS WILL and I simply trust Him that He does NOT make mistakes.
Guys…what else can you do? True..you can get angry, but anger has no end or purpose here because that kind of anger is from Satan and it will only destroy you and the ones you care about.
I repeat…being angry with God ultimately has NO value because NOTHING can come of it.
Ask any guy who has been angry towards God and he will tell you that he is NOT better off now BECAUSE he was angry. He will tell you he lost his wife and kids and wishes he would have listened to the person who told him to let go and TRUST God…
I know this is probably NOT the best answer you want to hear but this is where we are…God is NOT like you and me and therefore His ways do not match ours. Once we get that particular fact…then what I said above can make more sense.
I care a lot about Joe and pray that his outcome will be positive…but if it Gods will to take him home…Then Joe is in a better place and NO longer in pain and even though I will miss him…I’m ok with that…
Because I get to see him again…
I know this has been a much longer post than normal and for that I am sorry…but please listen to what I am saying to you…
Don’t get angry when you don’t understand what God is doing…
Just trust…
Until next time guys…
Iron Sharpens Iron, Men Strengthen Men 