Where Have All the Men Gone?

Posted: March 26, 2011 in Father, Husband
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My 8 year old son asked me to watch a program with him on the Disney channel the other day and so I thought, ”why not?”. “This could be a great Father, son bonding moment right?” so I plopped myself down next to him and we watched his show. 10 minutes into it however, I was shocked! Now, I’m not bagging on Disney, but the father in this show was an idiot, or at least being portrayed as one. He didn’t know anything and his children didn’t respect him. What irritated me the most however, was his relationship with his wife. He was a subservient wimp who required her approval before he could make a decision for his family. He seemed to blunder from one situation to another in front of all of them and his “being a buffoon”, was the central point of humor for the show. The final straw for me was he was NOT the leader of his house, nor could he be, because of the way he was portrayed. No one could, or did, respect him. This actor totally shattered the biblical requirement for men to be the head of their homes. What I thought was a simple Disney sitcom, was a subtle reason why, without a strong fatherly influence, boys grow up and don’t know their role in the family.

Guys, Christian men out there…what are we going to do about this!? We are clearly told in Ephesians 5:22- 6:4 that it is the fathers responsibility to be the head of the house just as Christ is the head of the church. We are called to LOVE our wives and raise our children up in the Lord. The fatherly influence here is both critical for our individual families as well as society. We need the men to be men…not wimps like I witnessed above.

I recently saw a snippet of a morning show where a woman author had written a book called Man Up. The premise of her book was simple, she was analyzing why, in todays society, guys are continuing to act like adolescents well into their forties and she wants to know why?…AND, has taken upon herself to tell the worlds men to MAN UP! Does anyone see a problem here? Society shows our boys through sitcoms, commercials and other media outlets, that its ok to be a wimp that asks for approval every step of the way, or the man “isn’t the only leader in the home” and yet when they grow up to be physically men, they wonder why they don’t know how to be loving husbands and fathers? Well I know the answer to this question…

Husbands, Fathers and Men. I challenge you right now to be, or become, the head of your household. I challenge you to lead by example and be the spiritual leader. I challenge you to read the Bible and pray in your homes. Set your sons…AND your daughters, up for success by YOU, portraying for them each day, how you love your wife and love them too. God set up the family structure this specific way for a reason and Satan is working overtime to mess it up…What are YOU going to do about that in YOUR home? We need men now, more than ever, to be Godly men…I am calling you out!…Remember Proverbs 27:17…As iron sharpens iron, so one man sharpens another. NOW IS THE TIME.

Inspired by my Aunt Phyllis…

Can you afford NO FEAR in your Life…?

Posted: March 13, 2011 in Heaven Bound
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Fear is a precarious thing; it can grip you and cause you to stop in your tracks and not advance another step. It can cause one to sweat, shiver, shake, or cry out. It can also have the opposite effect whereby one might act heroically and suddenly accomplish mighty things or at least things that wouldn’t have happened if fear were not present. We are told here in America through advertising, to use the No Fear as our approach to life. The No Fear method however, is a dangerous road to walk in life because without fear, we have NO humility, and without humility, we become arrogant, and the path of arrogance doesn’t end up very well.

There is also the fear of death, or maybe the fear of man, or fear of a group of people who are killers like in a gang. What about in history with Hitler’s destructive Nazi regime, who attempted to annihilate the entire population of Jews. Can you imagine the mortal fear the Jews felt as the Nazis swept into their city bent on death and destruction? This was pure fear at its concentrated worst. Now, I can go on and illustrate examples of horrific events throughout world history and demonstrate atrocities of conquerors whose sole purpose in life was death to cause fear. But my purpose would be to simply say yes, there have been, and continue to be, numerous reasons to be fearful of man and his acts toward other men. As long as we live here on this earth, this will never change. Nation will always rise against other nations bent with the intent to destroy and take over, and if you happen to be on the receiving end of the attack, God be with you.

But the objective of this note is to put fear into perspective and I can communicate this easier by using the words of Jesus Christ from the following verses of the Bible.

“Do not be afraid of those who kill the body but cannot kill the soul. Rather, be afraid of the One who can destroy both soul and body in hell”. Matthew 10:28

“But I will warn you whom to fear: fear the One who, after He has killed, has authority to cast into hell; yes, I tell you, fear Him! Luke 12:5

Guys, It’s hard to believe, especially after what I mentioned above, but Christ tells us NOT to fear anyone, or any regime of power, or any country, or any group of people who can only kill our bodies. Throughout history, people have died terrible deaths for many reasons, but as Christ points out, once you are dead, that is all a killer can do. Once you are dead, you are dead right?…Christ says that is NOT the true reason to fear…True fear should come from Him who after killing the body, has the power to destroy the soul (your soul) in hell. I know these are harsh words but I speak the truth.

Jesus clarification is helpful because as human beings, we only fear what we can see. It’s hard to fear what isn’t right in front of you. But I am telling you there is a kingdom upon this earth we cannot see with our human eyes and as the Bible tells us, where the powers and principalities of this world reside. When we die, there is more to come and that is what we, as men, should fear for both ourselves AND our families. Am I heaven bound? More than ever, I pray that you will echo the words of Joshua 24:15, where he says, “…But as for me and my house, we will serve the Lord”. This must be your number one priority as you move forward. Satan will not rest until he can destroy as many souls here on earth, as possible.

OK, so if you are now fearful and concerned about your future well-being, then I have your attention. So remember, if you seek God each day then you are NOT alone. Remember the words of Isaiah the Prophet;

“So do not fear, for I am with you; do not be dismayed, for I am your God. I will strengthen you and help you. I will uphold you with my righteous right hand”. 41:10

“For I am the Lord, your God, who takes hold of your right hand and says to you. DO NOT FEAR; I WILL HELP YOU”. 41:13

Why am I telling you this today? NOW is the time to be paying attention to what is going on around you. I do NOT want you to be lulled into a false sense of complacency. Satan is alive and well right now seeking who he can devour. Me personally? I wanted you to know what you should TRULY be afraid of…not the person who can just kill your body, but the one who can kill your soul…Can you afford to live your life with no fear…?

Save me a Spot…Aaron Rodgers

Posted: March 10, 2011 in Inspirational, Sports Stuff
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We are constantly reminded that this world is full of arrogant sports figures who love to listen their own press. Every now and then though, I am surprised when I get to read about a player who bucks the system completely. I did not write this story. This is written by a sports anchor from Fox 6 in Milwaukee whose name was not included. Guys, as a father who has lost a child, this story truly does my heart good. I hope you enjoy it as much as I did…

This job affords me some incredible opportunities. Being a member of the FOX 6 Sports team means I’ve been able to witness and report on events and people that many can only admire from a distance. I never take these situations for granted and sincerely appreciate being involved in whatever capacity each permits.

Monday marked just the most recent case as I had the unparalleled privilege to be a part of Aaron Rodgers charity event to benefit the MACC Fund, a charity towards eradicating childhood cancer and blood disorders.

Scattered throughout the crowd of rabid Packers aficionados, were the people who I consider the event’s real MVPs.. They are the families who’ve been forced to deal with one of life’s toughest sentences, the loss of a child.

Those who sprung for the tickets were not disappointed. In a world where many athletes regurgitate canned and rehearsed responses, the Packers quarterback was refreshingly candid. Aaron addressed a number of topics with in-depth, honest reaction – even some that if reprinted and mass distributed might raise some eyebrows.

Aaron stressed the importance of availability and accountability. In his opinion, it is a player’s responsibility to attend all of the team activities as they are all intended to better the team as a whole. And then, similarly, he addressed the importance of taking the heat/criticism when one falls short of expectations and duties.

He is never nervous to take the field. Aaron is supremely confident in the preparation he’s put in during the week leading up to Sunday’s match up. The way the 2009 season ended was disappointing but his self-confidence was not affected by the outcome. One of the toughest realizations was that that combination of players would never take the field together again. He likened the team to a family and admitted that conflict can and does occasionally exist but they try to handle such situations with maturity and civility.

He talked music and his love for tunes at a young age revealing that his mom used to sing and play lullabies and country music when he was a child. Aaron’s record label Suspended Sunrise is a product of this passion but also a contingency plan for life after football. His favorite song is Ben Harper’s ‘Forever’ and he’s envious of John Mayer’s guitar skills though not his tabloid reputation. He appreciated my affinity for Keith Urban but gave the audience a thumbs-down when I mentioned fellow country crooner Kenny Chesney.

His favorite book is The Bible and he tries to read it every day not just when life’s challenges and struggles surface. His favorite movie is The Princess Bride which he admits he’s caught flack for but says he and his childhood friends can recite every line from the film and it is simply a great story. Rodgers’ answers to questions on this night were certainly admirable. And I honestly didn’t think I could respect Aaron more. But I was wrong.

My friend, the father of that young girl who passed, was there that night. He was one of several attendees brought up on stage where he caught a football thrown by the quarterback of the Green Bay Packers. He asked Aaron to sign the football he’d caught. He wondered if he’d make it out to his daughter. It isn’t shocking that Rodgers obliged. What caught me off guard was the dedication he made. It wasn’t until after Aaron left that I first saw the autograph… and the simple yet sweet message that brought tears to this father’s eyes:

“To Cheri the angel. Save me a spot. – Aaron Rodgers”

I hope that Packers fans realize how lucky they are to have such an upstanding young man leading their team on the field every weekend. I hope they appreciate the challenges that were thrust upon him and acknowledge the maturity with which he handled them. I hope they stand behind the kid and respect him not only for his incredible talent but for his intelligence and honesty, poise and compassion.

My job has afforded me the chance to watch Aaron Rodgers play football for the last few seasons. But I am truly thankful for the opportunity to see the other side of this impressive young man and pass on some of what I witnessed to you.

Joe the Smog Guy

Posted: February 26, 2011 in Inspirational
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In California, we have this really cool thing we get to do called getting your car smogged. Every 2 years I get to find a smog station that can get me in on a weekend, typically because I never have time during the week and smog certify my car. That is always the part that is the most nerve-wracking to me…will my car pass the test? I have taken to using a more secure approach by changing a few key maintenance items on all my vehicles to ensure they pass the first time through…but I digress. You don’t care about my cars or my smog checks stories except for maybe this one.

Recently, I had 2 of my vehicles come up for their scheduled smog certifications at the same time and I happened to find a guy whose name is Joe, on a Saturday morning who was not busy and could handle both of my cars…great news. I took care of the first one, then ran home and got the second one, which happened to be the car my wife drives all the time. Why does this matter? Her car has a sign on the back that has a remembrance declaration on the back about our dearly departed daughter Kylie who went home to be with God a few years back.  It also proclaims the years she was here mentioned as well so as Joe went to drive the car into the stall to begin the test, I noticed him pause to read what was on the back window.

When he was finished he came over and commented on Kylie and asked me what happened. As I spoke to him, I could tell he was impacted by her and how sad her story was so I took that moment to share a few things about her and also how we have moved on since we lost her. I told Joe flat-out where I draw my strength and even though our situation was and still is amazingly difficult, we still trust and believe in Jesus Christ. For the first time in a long time, I spoke to someone who was very open to hearing what I had to say which I have to say, which gave me confidence. I gave Joe more information about my church and service times and we shook hands and said goodbye.

What I came away from this encounter was God didn’t need me to convert Joe, he needed me to simply talk with Joe. Joe was interested in how one deals with a significant loss and I, well have experience in that area. I spoke from my heart and Joe knew this and he responded accordingly. It reminded me of the verse in 1 Peter 3:15 –
But in your hearts set apart Christ as Lord. Always be prepared to give an answer to everyone who asks you to give the reason for the hope that you have. But do this with gentleness and respect.

I do have hope and it is strong within me…I hope it is strong within you as well. I leave you with this…anytime, anywhere God may call you to share your faith and your hope. In my case it was two men, standing in a smog station speaking about Him…Iron sharpening iron…

The Value of Time…

Posted: February 13, 2011 in Father, Husband
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Be joyful always, pray continually, give thanks in all circumstances, for this is God’s will for you in Christ Jesus. 1 Thessalonians 5:16-18

There has been a great deal written on the subject of time and how to manage it properly over the years. Growing up I heard “stop wasting time” and I need to be a “better steward of the time God gives me”. Later on in high school I remember hearing “You all are accountable to me for your time in this class” my teacher told us. I remember thinking he was taking this time thing a little to far…I’m accountable to him…really? But he was right, the time I spent studying for his class I was accountable to him and even more so when I failed a test. Then my “free time” dried up.

What I find ironic is when we make it to adulthood, we are encouraged with song titles like ”Time well wasted” and “Killing Time” which emphasize getting lost in the lack of managing our time. It’s like a switch was flipped and now I’m told forget about managing my time and just relax. So my question is, “Which direction should I go”?, Wasting time or time management? Well, as a responsible adult I think we need to find a spot somewhere in the middle as to how we control the time we are given. But, (and here is the “but” statement) the reality is we completely get caught up in the business of our lives and just forget about the “aah” moments with one another. I know you know what I mean when I refer to an aah moment. That split second of recognition when your little child sees his/hers Santa gifts on Christmas morning or maybe when you sneak up on them and surprise them with a ride on your shoulders or a good tickling. Those are AAh moments to me. Those simple moments in life I can take and be thankful for because nothing in this world can mean more to your child than meaningful time spent with them.

So you say, “great Kent, you have made me feel guilty, what is your point”? My point is very simple, as a father who has lost a child, my whole perspective on time and the moments of life we spend together has changed. Time lost cannot be regained not matter how hard you try. Unfortunately, I now understand the value of time and why moments with our children and family must be treasured because you don’t know when you may have all of it taken from you. One minute your life is great and next you find everything is swept away.

Ok, you say, I’m sorry for your loss but…that doesn’t apply to me. I’m a great parent and enjoy being a parent and spending time with my own children or my spouse. My question to you is Really? Have you actually made that connection in your brain where you said to yourself? “look at what I have in my life, this is awesome” Have you truly realized you should be thankful for what is right in front of you? I know I hadn’t. In fact, even though I had went through a scary time when my daughter was born with hospitalization and surgeries, I had since gone complacent and just took each day as it came never really grasping the actual moments and living them to the fullest…Thanking God for them. Appreciating them for what they were, valuable time.

It is strange to think we don’t take the time because we say we don’t have the time? I encourage you to take today and look at your wife and your kids and just say “thank you God for what you have given me”.

Simply put, appreciate the gifts you have been given. Appreciate the value of time…

Satan! Is that all you got?

Posted: February 12, 2011 in Tough Times
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My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness… 2 Corinthians 12:9

 

These are Christs words to Paul as he wrestled with his “thorn in the flesh” which many scholars believe was bad eyesight. Even though Paul pleaded with God 3 times to remove this deficiency from him, God refused which is when we see Jesus make reference to the verse above…

 

I think we can say that the “weakness” Christ refers to here are the low points or the difficult times we experience along life’s path. I hope this isn’t a surprise to you but accepting Christ into your life doesn’t negate hardships. In fact, I believe we are presented with more challenges or “grace opportunities” as Christians simply because God wants us to learn to trust Him during the times we need him the most. I don’t know about you, but I have a tough time with trust sometimes. How do you handle adversity when its thrown your way? You see I am one of those people who have written about and believe that our Lords desire is to surround himself in heaven with people who understand and practice God’s power being made perfect in my weakness. In other words I believe, God, wants to hang out with the folks who stood toe to toe against Satan during life’s battle and said, “Is that all you got?” Frankly, I have to admit, so do I…

 

But back to business; if you recall, the first part of this same verse talks about Gods grace being sufficient; Sometimes I have struggled to understand what grace really was to me? Is it a “get out of jail free card?” Or is it just a friend helping me back up when I fall? Then I read recently an easier way to think of grace. Grace is truly the “presence of God” in our lives. Try substituting “presence of God” next time you read grace and you will see what I mean. Grace is God’s physical strength from heaven given to you and me when we call on Him. I like that a lot. When I call on him, you can bet I am wrestling with something and need His help. Isn’t it encouraging that in our weakest points ever, God’s strength is made perfect in us? He is there! We are NOT alone. His grace, or His presence, is there to see us through the difficult path.

 

I truly hope you can be encouraged by these words. Those verses have changed my own life forever.

 

I pray for God’s grace in your life, each and every day…

Football fun fact minute

Posted: February 5, 2011 in Sports Stuff
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OK how about some fun facts for a minute. We are on the verge of the biggest game in sports this weekend, the Superbowl where the best team from each division square off on the largest stage in the world. The hype that is generated is always the biggest and commentators get to talk for hours about defense, offense and especially little tidbits that no one cares about because they have so much on air time to fill. By the way, on a side note, did you know that on Superbowl Sunday, inside Texas Stadium, there will be over 5000 lbs of hot dogs consumed by the attendees? I just had to throw that in there. But here is what I really didn’t know…According to the Wall Street Journal, during Football season, the average game length is around 174 minutes. Now this Sunday the length of time will be double that, or 360 minutes, or 6 hours which makes these facts I’m about to give you even more staggering. Because as you know, even though the broadcast is 6 hours long, the game is still (last time I checked) just 60 minutes total clock time…Now for the stats…Once the game starts we get to see the following:

  • 60 minutes of commercials (double, almost triple that for Superbowl Sunday)
  • 75 minutes of players huddling or milling around between snaps
  • 17 minutes of replays…and…
  • All told, just an actual 11 minutes of actual football.

Can you believe that? Just 11 minutes…So there you have it…and who says Americans waste time anyway? Enjoy the game wherever you are…

We have to be different than everybody else…

Posted: February 1, 2011 in Heaven Bound, Husband, Inspirational, Tough Times
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If not, then whats the point of being a Christian anyway? If we don’t act differently or have different morals than everyone else then why did Jesus come in the first place?

In 2 Corinthians 6:16-18, we learn from Paul that we are the temple and we must stay clean while we navigate through this very dirty world:

What agreement is there between the temple of God and idols? For we are the temple of the living God. As God has said: “I will live with them and walk among them, and I will be their God, and they will be my people.” “Therefore come out from them and be separate, says the Lord. Touch no unclean thing, and I will receive you.” “I will be a Father to you, and you will be my sons and daughters, says the Lord Almighty.”

God requires us as followers of Jesus Christ to separate ourselves both morally and spiritually from sin or anything that is contrary to His ways. In other words, when your friends invite you to Las Vegas for the weekend for some fun and chaos and then tell you that no one will find out? You might want to reconsider that decision…don’t set yourself up for failure. Worst of all, don’t buy into the advertisements that say what happens there, stays there…It (whatever “it” might be), will be with you for the rest of your life…and YOU get to live with IT. The rest of your life for one night?…not a very good trade off…

Another quick relevant Bible story…

When Joshua took the Children of Israel into the Promised land, God gave him some very harsh and strict instructions, kill everyone you come into contact with…they all must die. Under no circumstances were they to allow any of them to live because they were heathen of the worst kind and God knew that if they yielded, the children of israel would assimilate into their cultures instead of “tuck them in” into their own. Read Deuteronomy 20:16-18 and see what God said…Why does this matter to you and me? Because are you really confident that you can spend time around temptation and NOT end up yielding to it? God knew completely that the Children of Israel would fail…and they did. They could not live next door to Las Vegas without becoming just like them, vulgar sinners and prostitutes… and I don’t want the same thing to happen to you…

Guys, I pray for you that you can indeed separate yourself from all the nasty stuff throws your direction and work each day by staying pure before Him. My best advice to you…Stay on your knees brother.

It doesn’t cost anything to be nice…

Posted: January 14, 2011 in Inspirational
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A kind man benefits himself, but a cruel man brings trouble on himself.

Proverbs 11:17

I recently had an amazing experience with a young man who used to work for me at another company a couple of years ago. I can remember, everyday, I would see this guy working as hard as he could to do his job to the best of his ability. I don’t think I ever saw him without sweat just pouring off of him, doing what needed to be done. To make matters even more amazing, he would do his job with a huge smile on his face. One day I had the opportunity to speak with him about more than just a job going through our plant. I told him I appreciated his hard work and all his efforts and I remember saying I think you are a smart guy and you will move on and become more than just this entry level position to which I received a big smile again. I moved on to my next task and never thought about this again…

Fast forward 2 years. New company and new people and as I made my way through the plant and I see this same fellow working away only now he was running a much larger and more expensive piece of equipment. We made eye contact and I waved and he called me over and wanted to speak with me. He said, “do you remember me”? And I said, “of course I do Jose, how are you”, He said, “I remembered what you said and I kept working hard and now look what I have become”, and he held his arms out wide. Then it was my turn to smile…

Guys, I assure you I am just a regular guy like you and not an expert on human behavior and I’m not relating this story to you to bring attention to myself. I tell you this because of the realization I had that day about simply saying what was on my mind; something that was kind and true; and never realizing the impact my words had on him. As the man in charge or the leader of a household, it is easy to criticize others thinking they will be motivated as a result. Frankly, that is not the case. Negative comments cause animosity and frustration with whomever you speak with, your employees, your wife or your children. When you take the time to say something positive, you will reap a huge reward. Like me, you may find what you said helped motivate somebody to think they could be more…

Is my Salvation assured? Am I going to Heaven?

Posted: January 9, 2011 in Heaven Bound
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In this day of Blogs and numbered lists about how to improve my abs, or save money from home, I thought I would create the same thing for what I think are the most important questions any of us should be asking ourselves…

Is MY Salvation assured? Am I going to Heaven?

I think it is a very safe bet to assume that if I asked you if you want to go Heaven your answer would be yes. I mean, who wouldn’t? As Christians, we became believers with the promise of Heaven in our collective futures.

Some of you have been Christians for your entire lives and are still banking your eternal future on that single experience when you were 5 years old. If that describes your circumstance, then you are making a grave mistake.

What if I could provide you a list of 9 points, that if followed, you would be assured of eternal life, would you be interested?

Here they are for your review and consideration;

  1. Believe in the name of the Son of God, Jesus Christ. 1 John 5:13 – I write these things to you who believe in the name of the Son of God so that you may know you have eternal life.
  2. Honor Christ as Lord of your life and obey His commands. 1 John 2:3-5 – We know that we have come to know him if we obey his commands. The man who says, “I know him,” but does not do what he commands is a liar, and the truth is not in him. But if anyone obeys his word, God’s love is truly made complete in him. This is how we know we are in him.
  3. Love God the Father, and Jesus the Son and overcome the influence of the world. 1 John 2:15-16 – Do not love the world or anything in the world. If anyone loves the world, the love of the Father is not in him. For everything in the world-the cravings of sinful man, the lust of his eyes and the boasting of what he has and does-comes not from the Father but from the world.
  4. Consistently and persistently practice righteousness. 1 John 2:29 – If you know that he is righteous, you know that everyone who does what is right has been born of him.
  5. Love our brothers and our sisters. 1 John 3:14, 19 – We know that we have passed from death to life, because we love our brothers. Anyone who does not love remains in death. This then is how we know that we belong to the truth, and how we set our hearts at rest in his presence.
  6. Be aware of the Holy Spirit within us. 1 John 3:24 – Those who obey his commands live in him, and he in them. And this is how we know that he lives in us: We know it by the Spirit he gave us.
  7. We must strive to follow Jesus and live as He lived. 1 John 2:6 – Whoever claims to live in him must walk as Jesus did.
  8. We must believe, accept and remain in the Living Christ. 1 John 2:24 – See that what you have heard from the beginning remains in you. If it does, you also will remain in the Son and in the Father.
  9. We must possess a true longing and unwavering hope for Christ’s return to receive us into heaven. 1 John 3:2-3 – Dear friends, now we are children of God, and what we will be, has not yet been made known. But we know that when he appears, we shall be like him, for we shall see him as he is. Everyone who has this hope in him purifies himself, just as he is pure. 

Reference: Full Life Study Bible, NIV, copyright 1988­

So here they are, all in one place for you to read them and memorize them.

Having read through them myself a few times and understanding the “heart condition” required to maintain them effectively…I can tell you this, follow these few points and I will get to see you in Heaven.

Looking forward to it…

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