Whatever happened to Normal?

Posted: April 22, 2011 in Husband, Inspirational, Tough Times
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If you’re like me, you may spend a little time each day catching up on world news or maybe your favorite sports team because as guys, we like to know what is going on, right? Is it me, or does it seem that right now, more than any other time in our lifetime, that the World, and America, is just out of control? It’s like what is wrong is now right and whats right, is now wrong…That’s the way it appears to me. Today I read online that a man in New York City broke up a fight happening in a McDonald’s restaurant and 10 minutes later, someone killed him for it…? I am completely dumbfounded…? When did the switch get flipped so that right and wrong are backwards? This kind of lunacy is now the everyday normal and you, me, and every other Christian family has to deal with this craziness.

Guys, I wish I had a good answer to help you with what we see going on around us but the reality is that Satan is alive and well on this earth…for now. He thinks he’s in charge and he is ramping up his attacks on humanity because frankly, I believe, the time we have left on earth is short.

Take a look at 2 Corinthians 4:3-4, where it says:

And even if our gospel is veiled, it is veiled to those who are perishing. The god of this age has blinded the minds of unbelievers, so that they cannot see the light of the gospel of the glory of Christ, who is the image of God.

Satan is actively working to keep unbelievers still unbelievers, and to turn believers into unbelievers…He wants to take as many of us down with him as he can. Why? Because he HATES you. He absolutely LOATHES you and is working this very minute to to take you down, permanently. He is lying in wait looking for someone to consume…Maybe you, or someone in your family?

Remember 1 Peter 5:8?

Be self-controlled and alert. Your enemy the devil prowls around like a roaring lion looking for someone to devour.

He also wants to present you with 1000 reasons why you shouldn’t proceed down the narrow path…Maybe that means cheating on your wife? Or spending time with pornography? I could go on and on…You will continually have these types of major roadblocks thrown in your path as a Christian man. He wants you to fail and to do that he will find your weakness and make it very easy for you to fall. In fact, it will be so subtle that you may think, ”Aaah…just this once, no one will know and really, just this once”…Guess what? HE HAS GOT YOU! Look up above at that verse…It says, Be self-controlled and ALERT. Remember, sin is subtle. It slowly creeps into your life and worms its way into your inner most thoughts…

Guys, I will not lie to you…It is HARD to resist temptation… but I will give you a reason from Christ to keep on resisting:

Matthew 7:13-14

Enter through the narrow gate. For wide is the gate and broad is the road that leads to destruction, and many enter through it. But small is the gate and narrow the road that leads to life, and only a few find it.

Where do you fit into all of this? Are you disgusted with what you see around you or are you assimilating into the culture? Do you find all of this harder and harder to deal with or do you just not understand what the big deal is about? Guys, I challenge you to remember that the enemy is out there waiting to destroy you, and anyone else who is dear to you…I challenge you to keep your eyes on Christ and to simply hold on tight…HE WILL NOT LET GO OF YOU…

You are Not Alone…

Posted: April 16, 2011 in Father, Husband, Inspirational
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I had lunch with a friend of mine this past week because we hadn’t seen each other in a couple of months and we wanted to reconnect. I knew this particular friend has had a tough go of things lately. He had been in and out of jobs for the last 4 years due to no fault of his own. He was in a business that was simply more susceptible to the economy than most. What struck me though, was how far this guy had fallen. Just so you understand, my friend has a way about him that is infectious. He is FUN to be around and we both enjoy teasing our older kids. Our families enjoy one another…He is an all around great guy however, the guy I had lunch with this week, was NOT the same man. This guy was broken and he is angry at God for constantly being out of work. His children are grown up and away at college so he finds himself alone most of the time which only make matters worse. He told me he still goes to church on Sundays, but he doesn’t listen anymore. He feels as if God has abandoned him…

I know there are a great deal of men, just like my friend, who feel this same way. They continually ask themselves, “whats the point?” “Why am I going through this?”, “ I AM ALONE”.

Guys, as one who has walked in the valley of the shadow of despair at the loss of my only daughter Kylie, YOU ARE NOT ALONE! God will never leave you or forget you! You DO have someone to hold onto during your storm and his name is Jesus Christ. The purpose of this article is to remind…and to encourage you if you happen to be in this place also.

Lets start with the Bible, Gods Word, here on earth, given to us. I’ve heard guys say, “those are just words, what can they do for me right now when I’m in the middle of this?” Trust me, they are not just words, they are power and strength you, and your family, can tap into during the tough times.

Proverbs 3: 5-6 tells us to:

Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding. In all your ways acknowledge Him and He will direct your paths.

What these verses tell me is their will be things that happen in our lives that we won’t understand…It wont make any sense. Can you tell me why God decided to take my beautiful 12-year-old daughter? I don’t get that and I never will but I’ve come to realize that my trying to understand why?…that is NOT my job. My job is to completely trust in Him…even though I don’t understand why. Do you remember the story of Peter when he got out of the boat and started walking on the water to meet Jesus? (Matthew 14:29-30) He was actually walking on water until he took his eyes off of Christ and then what happened? He started sinking fast…and what was his reaction? He cried, “Lord save me!” which is exactly what we are supposed to do…

But maybe that is the crux of the problem. We are guys and we don’t need any help…Isn’t that right? Well I can tell you that David, one of the greatest warriors that ever lived in history, he didn’t feel that way. In fact David ran for his life for over 10 years because Saul was out to kill him but yet he still said this in Psalms 31: 13-14:

For I hear the slander of many; there is terror on every side; they conspire against me and plot to take my life. But I trust in you, O Lord; I say, “You are my God.”

What I am saying is this…Now is the time to set your eyes on Him. Don’t waver. Look up to heaven and say “Lord, I do NOT understand any of this crap that is happening to me. I am struggling mightily with all of this everyday…But I know this, You are on the throne and You don’t make mistakes and even though this (whatever “this” is for you) makes no sense, I am going to keep my eyes fixed on You and my trust completely in You so that whatever happens, we are in this together and we will get through this…together…

Guys, I’m not an evangelist or a Bible scholar who teaches in a university…I’m just a regular guy, like you, trying to make my way in this world. My answers are not scholarly, they are from my heart from reading God’s word and they have helped me during my own pain on this earth. I know many of you out there are hurting and please understand that my words are meant to encourage you. You can make it through this and I will continue to pray that God draws near to you during your time of need…

Be strong my brother…”weeping may remain for a night, but rejoicing comes in the morning”…

Yep, you guessed it, David said that too…

Let me leave you with one more thing:

Thats my King…Dr. S.M. Lockridge

Posted: March 30, 2011 in Inspirational
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Guys…this is just plain old fashioned and I admit that…but I also have to say that this short 3 minute video is the best description I have ever heard given about Jesus Christ in my entire life. This man can bring the gospel at a level we need right now.  He truly TELLS IT LIKE IT IS…

S.M. Lockridge, was a prominent African-American Pastor of Calvary Baptist Church located in San Diego, California from 1953 to 1993. He passed away back in 2000.

Please have a listen…if this one doesn’t stir your heart…check your pulse…

I truly hope you enjoyed it as much as I did. Stay tuned for the next post…God Bless…

Where Have All the Men Gone?

Posted: March 26, 2011 in Father, Husband
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My 8 year old son asked me to watch a program with him on the Disney channel the other day and so I thought, ”why not?”. “This could be a great Father, son bonding moment right?” so I plopped myself down next to him and we watched his show. 10 minutes into it however, I was shocked! Now, I’m not bagging on Disney, but the father in this show was an idiot, or at least being portrayed as one. He didn’t know anything and his children didn’t respect him. What irritated me the most however, was his relationship with his wife. He was a subservient wimp who required her approval before he could make a decision for his family. He seemed to blunder from one situation to another in front of all of them and his “being a buffoon”, was the central point of humor for the show. The final straw for me was he was NOT the leader of his house, nor could he be, because of the way he was portrayed. No one could, or did, respect him. This actor totally shattered the biblical requirement for men to be the head of their homes. What I thought was a simple Disney sitcom, was a subtle reason why, without a strong fatherly influence, boys grow up and don’t know their role in the family.

Guys, Christian men out there…what are we going to do about this!? We are clearly told in Ephesians 5:22- 6:4 that it is the fathers responsibility to be the head of the house just as Christ is the head of the church. We are called to LOVE our wives and raise our children up in the Lord. The fatherly influence here is both critical for our individual families as well as society. We need the men to be men…not wimps like I witnessed above.

I recently saw a snippet of a morning show where a woman author had written a book called Man Up. The premise of her book was simple, she was analyzing why, in todays society, guys are continuing to act like adolescents well into their forties and she wants to know why?…AND, has taken upon herself to tell the worlds men to MAN UP! Does anyone see a problem here? Society shows our boys through sitcoms, commercials and other media outlets, that its ok to be a wimp that asks for approval every step of the way, or the man “isn’t the only leader in the home” and yet when they grow up to be physically men, they wonder why they don’t know how to be loving husbands and fathers? Well I know the answer to this question…

Husbands, Fathers and Men. I challenge you right now to be, or become, the head of your household. I challenge you to lead by example and be the spiritual leader. I challenge you to read the Bible and pray in your homes. Set your sons…AND your daughters, up for success by YOU, portraying for them each day, how you love your wife and love them too. God set up the family structure this specific way for a reason and Satan is working overtime to mess it up…What are YOU going to do about that in YOUR home? We need men now, more than ever, to be Godly men…I am calling you out!…Remember Proverbs 27:17…As iron sharpens iron, so one man sharpens another. NOW IS THE TIME.

Inspired by my Aunt Phyllis…

Can you afford NO FEAR in your Life…?

Posted: March 13, 2011 in Heaven Bound
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Fear is a precarious thing; it can grip you and cause you to stop in your tracks and not advance another step. It can cause one to sweat, shiver, shake, or cry out. It can also have the opposite effect whereby one might act heroically and suddenly accomplish mighty things or at least things that wouldn’t have happened if fear were not present. We are told here in America through advertising, to use the No Fear as our approach to life. The No Fear method however, is a dangerous road to walk in life because without fear, we have NO humility, and without humility, we become arrogant, and the path of arrogance doesn’t end up very well.

There is also the fear of death, or maybe the fear of man, or fear of a group of people who are killers like in a gang. What about in history with Hitler’s destructive Nazi regime, who attempted to annihilate the entire population of Jews. Can you imagine the mortal fear the Jews felt as the Nazis swept into their city bent on death and destruction? This was pure fear at its concentrated worst. Now, I can go on and illustrate examples of horrific events throughout world history and demonstrate atrocities of conquerors whose sole purpose in life was death to cause fear. But my purpose would be to simply say yes, there have been, and continue to be, numerous reasons to be fearful of man and his acts toward other men. As long as we live here on this earth, this will never change. Nation will always rise against other nations bent with the intent to destroy and take over, and if you happen to be on the receiving end of the attack, God be with you.

But the objective of this note is to put fear into perspective and I can communicate this easier by using the words of Jesus Christ from the following verses of the Bible.

“Do not be afraid of those who kill the body but cannot kill the soul. Rather, be afraid of the One who can destroy both soul and body in hell”. Matthew 10:28

“But I will warn you whom to fear: fear the One who, after He has killed, has authority to cast into hell; yes, I tell you, fear Him! Luke 12:5

Guys, It’s hard to believe, especially after what I mentioned above, but Christ tells us NOT to fear anyone, or any regime of power, or any country, or any group of people who can only kill our bodies. Throughout history, people have died terrible deaths for many reasons, but as Christ points out, once you are dead, that is all a killer can do. Once you are dead, you are dead right?…Christ says that is NOT the true reason to fear…True fear should come from Him who after killing the body, has the power to destroy the soul (your soul) in hell. I know these are harsh words but I speak the truth.

Jesus clarification is helpful because as human beings, we only fear what we can see. It’s hard to fear what isn’t right in front of you. But I am telling you there is a kingdom upon this earth we cannot see with our human eyes and as the Bible tells us, where the powers and principalities of this world reside. When we die, there is more to come and that is what we, as men, should fear for both ourselves AND our families. Am I heaven bound? More than ever, I pray that you will echo the words of Joshua 24:15, where he says, “…But as for me and my house, we will serve the Lord”. This must be your number one priority as you move forward. Satan will not rest until he can destroy as many souls here on earth, as possible.

OK, so if you are now fearful and concerned about your future well-being, then I have your attention. So remember, if you seek God each day then you are NOT alone. Remember the words of Isaiah the Prophet;

“So do not fear, for I am with you; do not be dismayed, for I am your God. I will strengthen you and help you. I will uphold you with my righteous right hand”. 41:10

“For I am the Lord, your God, who takes hold of your right hand and says to you. DO NOT FEAR; I WILL HELP YOU”. 41:13

Why am I telling you this today? NOW is the time to be paying attention to what is going on around you. I do NOT want you to be lulled into a false sense of complacency. Satan is alive and well right now seeking who he can devour. Me personally? I wanted you to know what you should TRULY be afraid of…not the person who can just kill your body, but the one who can kill your soul…Can you afford to live your life with no fear…?

Save me a Spot…Aaron Rodgers

Posted: March 10, 2011 in Inspirational, Sports Stuff
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We are constantly reminded that this world is full of arrogant sports figures who love to listen their own press. Every now and then though, I am surprised when I get to read about a player who bucks the system completely. I did not write this story. This is written by a sports anchor from Fox 6 in Milwaukee whose name was not included. Guys, as a father who has lost a child, this story truly does my heart good. I hope you enjoy it as much as I did…

This job affords me some incredible opportunities. Being a member of the FOX 6 Sports team means I’ve been able to witness and report on events and people that many can only admire from a distance. I never take these situations for granted and sincerely appreciate being involved in whatever capacity each permits.

Monday marked just the most recent case as I had the unparalleled privilege to be a part of Aaron Rodgers charity event to benefit the MACC Fund, a charity towards eradicating childhood cancer and blood disorders.

Scattered throughout the crowd of rabid Packers aficionados, were the people who I consider the event’s real MVPs.. They are the families who’ve been forced to deal with one of life’s toughest sentences, the loss of a child.

Those who sprung for the tickets were not disappointed. In a world where many athletes regurgitate canned and rehearsed responses, the Packers quarterback was refreshingly candid. Aaron addressed a number of topics with in-depth, honest reaction – even some that if reprinted and mass distributed might raise some eyebrows.

Aaron stressed the importance of availability and accountability. In his opinion, it is a player’s responsibility to attend all of the team activities as they are all intended to better the team as a whole. And then, similarly, he addressed the importance of taking the heat/criticism when one falls short of expectations and duties.

He is never nervous to take the field. Aaron is supremely confident in the preparation he’s put in during the week leading up to Sunday’s match up. The way the 2009 season ended was disappointing but his self-confidence was not affected by the outcome. One of the toughest realizations was that that combination of players would never take the field together again. He likened the team to a family and admitted that conflict can and does occasionally exist but they try to handle such situations with maturity and civility.

He talked music and his love for tunes at a young age revealing that his mom used to sing and play lullabies and country music when he was a child. Aaron’s record label Suspended Sunrise is a product of this passion but also a contingency plan for life after football. His favorite song is Ben Harper’s ‘Forever’ and he’s envious of John Mayer’s guitar skills though not his tabloid reputation. He appreciated my affinity for Keith Urban but gave the audience a thumbs-down when I mentioned fellow country crooner Kenny Chesney.

His favorite book is The Bible and he tries to read it every day not just when life’s challenges and struggles surface. His favorite movie is The Princess Bride which he admits he’s caught flack for but says he and his childhood friends can recite every line from the film and it is simply a great story. Rodgers’ answers to questions on this night were certainly admirable. And I honestly didn’t think I could respect Aaron more. But I was wrong.

My friend, the father of that young girl who passed, was there that night. He was one of several attendees brought up on stage where he caught a football thrown by the quarterback of the Green Bay Packers. He asked Aaron to sign the football he’d caught. He wondered if he’d make it out to his daughter. It isn’t shocking that Rodgers obliged. What caught me off guard was the dedication he made. It wasn’t until after Aaron left that I first saw the autograph… and the simple yet sweet message that brought tears to this father’s eyes:

“To Cheri the angel. Save me a spot. – Aaron Rodgers”

I hope that Packers fans realize how lucky they are to have such an upstanding young man leading their team on the field every weekend. I hope they appreciate the challenges that were thrust upon him and acknowledge the maturity with which he handled them. I hope they stand behind the kid and respect him not only for his incredible talent but for his intelligence and honesty, poise and compassion.

My job has afforded me the chance to watch Aaron Rodgers play football for the last few seasons. But I am truly thankful for the opportunity to see the other side of this impressive young man and pass on some of what I witnessed to you.

Joe the Smog Guy

Posted: February 26, 2011 in Inspirational
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In California, we have this really cool thing we get to do called getting your car smogged. Every 2 years I get to find a smog station that can get me in on a weekend, typically because I never have time during the week and smog certify my car. That is always the part that is the most nerve-wracking to me…will my car pass the test? I have taken to using a more secure approach by changing a few key maintenance items on all my vehicles to ensure they pass the first time through…but I digress. You don’t care about my cars or my smog checks stories except for maybe this one.

Recently, I had 2 of my vehicles come up for their scheduled smog certifications at the same time and I happened to find a guy whose name is Joe, on a Saturday morning who was not busy and could handle both of my cars…great news. I took care of the first one, then ran home and got the second one, which happened to be the car my wife drives all the time. Why does this matter? Her car has a sign on the back that has a remembrance declaration on the back about our dearly departed daughter Kylie who went home to be with God a few years back.  It also proclaims the years she was here mentioned as well so as Joe went to drive the car into the stall to begin the test, I noticed him pause to read what was on the back window.

When he was finished he came over and commented on Kylie and asked me what happened. As I spoke to him, I could tell he was impacted by her and how sad her story was so I took that moment to share a few things about her and also how we have moved on since we lost her. I told Joe flat-out where I draw my strength and even though our situation was and still is amazingly difficult, we still trust and believe in Jesus Christ. For the first time in a long time, I spoke to someone who was very open to hearing what I had to say which I have to say, which gave me confidence. I gave Joe more information about my church and service times and we shook hands and said goodbye.

What I came away from this encounter was God didn’t need me to convert Joe, he needed me to simply talk with Joe. Joe was interested in how one deals with a significant loss and I, well have experience in that area. I spoke from my heart and Joe knew this and he responded accordingly. It reminded me of the verse in 1 Peter 3:15 –
But in your hearts set apart Christ as Lord. Always be prepared to give an answer to everyone who asks you to give the reason for the hope that you have. But do this with gentleness and respect.

I do have hope and it is strong within me…I hope it is strong within you as well. I leave you with this…anytime, anywhere God may call you to share your faith and your hope. In my case it was two men, standing in a smog station speaking about Him…Iron sharpening iron…

The Value of Time…

Posted: February 13, 2011 in Father, Husband
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Be joyful always, pray continually, give thanks in all circumstances, for this is God’s will for you in Christ Jesus. 1 Thessalonians 5:16-18

There has been a great deal written on the subject of time and how to manage it properly over the years. Growing up I heard “stop wasting time” and I need to be a “better steward of the time God gives me”. Later on in high school I remember hearing “You all are accountable to me for your time in this class” my teacher told us. I remember thinking he was taking this time thing a little to far…I’m accountable to him…really? But he was right, the time I spent studying for his class I was accountable to him and even more so when I failed a test. Then my “free time” dried up.

What I find ironic is when we make it to adulthood, we are encouraged with song titles like ”Time well wasted” and “Killing Time” which emphasize getting lost in the lack of managing our time. It’s like a switch was flipped and now I’m told forget about managing my time and just relax. So my question is, “Which direction should I go”?, Wasting time or time management? Well, as a responsible adult I think we need to find a spot somewhere in the middle as to how we control the time we are given. But, (and here is the “but” statement) the reality is we completely get caught up in the business of our lives and just forget about the “aah” moments with one another. I know you know what I mean when I refer to an aah moment. That split second of recognition when your little child sees his/hers Santa gifts on Christmas morning or maybe when you sneak up on them and surprise them with a ride on your shoulders or a good tickling. Those are AAh moments to me. Those simple moments in life I can take and be thankful for because nothing in this world can mean more to your child than meaningful time spent with them.

So you say, “great Kent, you have made me feel guilty, what is your point”? My point is very simple, as a father who has lost a child, my whole perspective on time and the moments of life we spend together has changed. Time lost cannot be regained not matter how hard you try. Unfortunately, I now understand the value of time and why moments with our children and family must be treasured because you don’t know when you may have all of it taken from you. One minute your life is great and next you find everything is swept away.

Ok, you say, I’m sorry for your loss but…that doesn’t apply to me. I’m a great parent and enjoy being a parent and spending time with my own children or my spouse. My question to you is Really? Have you actually made that connection in your brain where you said to yourself? “look at what I have in my life, this is awesome” Have you truly realized you should be thankful for what is right in front of you? I know I hadn’t. In fact, even though I had went through a scary time when my daughter was born with hospitalization and surgeries, I had since gone complacent and just took each day as it came never really grasping the actual moments and living them to the fullest…Thanking God for them. Appreciating them for what they were, valuable time.

It is strange to think we don’t take the time because we say we don’t have the time? I encourage you to take today and look at your wife and your kids and just say “thank you God for what you have given me”.

Simply put, appreciate the gifts you have been given. Appreciate the value of time…

Satan! Is that all you got?

Posted: February 12, 2011 in Tough Times
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My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness… 2 Corinthians 12:9

 

These are Christs words to Paul as he wrestled with his “thorn in the flesh” which many scholars believe was bad eyesight. Even though Paul pleaded with God 3 times to remove this deficiency from him, God refused which is when we see Jesus make reference to the verse above…

 

I think we can say that the “weakness” Christ refers to here are the low points or the difficult times we experience along life’s path. I hope this isn’t a surprise to you but accepting Christ into your life doesn’t negate hardships. In fact, I believe we are presented with more challenges or “grace opportunities” as Christians simply because God wants us to learn to trust Him during the times we need him the most. I don’t know about you, but I have a tough time with trust sometimes. How do you handle adversity when its thrown your way? You see I am one of those people who have written about and believe that our Lords desire is to surround himself in heaven with people who understand and practice God’s power being made perfect in my weakness. In other words I believe, God, wants to hang out with the folks who stood toe to toe against Satan during life’s battle and said, “Is that all you got?” Frankly, I have to admit, so do I…

 

But back to business; if you recall, the first part of this same verse talks about Gods grace being sufficient; Sometimes I have struggled to understand what grace really was to me? Is it a “get out of jail free card?” Or is it just a friend helping me back up when I fall? Then I read recently an easier way to think of grace. Grace is truly the “presence of God” in our lives. Try substituting “presence of God” next time you read grace and you will see what I mean. Grace is God’s physical strength from heaven given to you and me when we call on Him. I like that a lot. When I call on him, you can bet I am wrestling with something and need His help. Isn’t it encouraging that in our weakest points ever, God’s strength is made perfect in us? He is there! We are NOT alone. His grace, or His presence, is there to see us through the difficult path.

 

I truly hope you can be encouraged by these words. Those verses have changed my own life forever.

 

I pray for God’s grace in your life, each and every day…

Football fun fact minute

Posted: February 5, 2011 in Sports Stuff
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OK how about some fun facts for a minute. We are on the verge of the biggest game in sports this weekend, the Superbowl where the best team from each division square off on the largest stage in the world. The hype that is generated is always the biggest and commentators get to talk for hours about defense, offense and especially little tidbits that no one cares about because they have so much on air time to fill. By the way, on a side note, did you know that on Superbowl Sunday, inside Texas Stadium, there will be over 5000 lbs of hot dogs consumed by the attendees? I just had to throw that in there. But here is what I really didn’t know…According to the Wall Street Journal, during Football season, the average game length is around 174 minutes. Now this Sunday the length of time will be double that, or 360 minutes, or 6 hours which makes these facts I’m about to give you even more staggering. Because as you know, even though the broadcast is 6 hours long, the game is still (last time I checked) just 60 minutes total clock time…Now for the stats…Once the game starts we get to see the following:

  • 60 minutes of commercials (double, almost triple that for Superbowl Sunday)
  • 75 minutes of players huddling or milling around between snaps
  • 17 minutes of replays…and…
  • All told, just an actual 11 minutes of actual football.

Can you believe that? Just 11 minutes…So there you have it…and who says Americans waste time anyway? Enjoy the game wherever you are…

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